finding a way to be kind to what causes you pain.
finding a way to be kind to what causes you pain.
Lucinda Williams latest on the player. smell of steaming pumpkin gonna make a pie. tomorrow gonna do pumpkin ravioli. shellys out to pick up Morgan from school. cooking fresh beets to go with diner, will do a rosemary oven- roast potatoes – morgan love s the rosemary ( par boil or steam chunked potatoes with skins on if you like, cool n dry, drizzle in olive oil, go on get your hands wet mix em til they are coated, salt and sweet paprika go well, lay into a hot oven dish oven at 230c, sprinkle with handful of rosemary leaves, roast for about an hour.) also make some organic beef burgers to go with.
but right now the aroma of pumpkin is so lovely and i havent even made it into filling yet and the sun has been out all day and is slow and gentle in the setting and all ove the world people are dying killed in wars and retributions of biblical proportions, I cannot ignore them, i will not look away, I will make pumpkin pie for them and for my family and hope somehow the peace i live with will make it to the deaths they are dying and comfort their fears of what lies ahead. and maybe i’m fuckin crazy but it feels like this is what i have to do to not go crazy. I have to look at what is in this life, i have to see the suffering and then have the courage to think of this while making pumpkin pie with love and with soft heart and maybe even cry. but i never never dishonour anyone by pretending they dont exist.
so heres the photo. pie was yum. wine not so much. will do a little wine blurb another day. no time now. must tend the fire n see if i can reason with the child regarding the fact that the crankier you get the harder the homework becomes. then take the dog for a walk, semi dark and wintery, just the way we like the lonely lake side wanderings here in the irish mid-lands.
semi strange thing: yesterday got email from me brother David, havent heard from him in a while. today my drivers lic. comes in the post, they issued it to me with my middle name, my first name doesnt even appear on it. (even though i’d filled out forms etc and provided a copy of my passport) so my middle name is David.
“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round heads in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules and they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify them, or vilify them. But the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.”
— Jack Kerouac
So all quite on the autumnal front. hazy kinda fuzzy sunlite afternoon. working on my newest poetry collection “Still Wishing To Be Ravens”. Lapwing has sent me final proofs of new book. Morgan n I are on the cover. 64 pages of poetry. Dennis says he should be able to send me a batch in a week or so. Then i guess its read and sell to my adoring public. Great yoga session and did meditation. Morgan kept me company she sat tucked up in our bed while i used the bedroom floor. She was reading Dr Who magazine and the magic pony stories.
Tonight most excellent Shell will make her most excellent fish pie, tastes so much better than it sounds, pieces of smoked cod, plain cod, haddock, salmon, prawns, some diced carrots and peas all cooked in a basic bechamel sauce with smoked cheddar and some whole grain mustard mixed in at the end, a mashed potato topping with some grated nutmeg and a few knobs of butter that melt and make a crispy crust on top. best served with a nice cold dry white wine.
Stay tuned for pie photos and up dates.
Morgan is tucked up on the couch by the fire watching Night At The Museum and other stuff, while sipping herbal soother remedies. Still a lingering cough. But at least no fever.
Now print out rough draft of “Ravens”. Then a walk by the sun setting november lake all oranges and pinks muted by rolling steel waves…
Tip: check out A Road Full Of Ducks, by Tantra Bensko at calliope nerve. amazing piece of writing!!!!!!!
so second v&t a grammatic incorrection because properly it should be G&T but only have vodka left over from the tincturing; another benefit of tincture making is that there’s always a jug of left over vodka some where. making veggie soup with white beans, side salad and some crusty bread for dinner, and listening to Kathleen Edwards Failer album while doing so, and typing away while waiting for things to boil n cook etc. soups on and about ready, beans done and added to soup, Stock: quartered onion sauteed with two crushed garlic cloves in olive oil, add rough chopped 3-4 sticks celery with leaves, a good sized carrot & a half chopped diagonally in rough thicknesses, some baby corn chopped & sauteed with other stuff. add abt 1 quarter cup of white dry wine, ten mins or so later add a good dose (one small can) of tomato paste ,and then a pint n a half of water bring to boil n simmer while beans cook. cook beans with a few garlic unpeeled cloves n a few sage leaves ( add a few sage leaves n parsley to your soup stock as well a small handful of dried parsley) drain beans when soft, add to soup remove skins from bean garlic, and mash then add to soup; garlic should make a nice paste at this point. cook together until veg are the texture you like. serve over separately cooked al dente pasta.
tip: all recipes are starting points, a place you can jump off of. cooking without intuition is just drudge
tip#2 remember that food creates the bodies of those you love your family n yourself ( if you dont love yourself yet then please start right now!) and that our bodies while not us are a really useful tool for the life we have at this moment.
today is my birthday. Morgan and shelly brought me presents in bed, and coffee and porridge too! and last night i couldnt sleep, not anxiety just energy, and i could see that little red bicycle, the first two-wheeler, the one i learned to ride on, it was red and had white pin stripes on ether side of its little fenders and it had training wheels, (stabilizers) and these had white wheels with red pin stripe one on each. this bike had solid rubber wheels – they were getting wore out. my father ran with me, the first day without stabilizers, her held on to the back of the little seat and at some point he let go… i was yelling to him to let go now let go … wanting to try it on my own but he already had. as soon as i realized this i tipped over… but i got back on and kept going
these days Morgan is learning how to ride her bike. shes nine she is impatient and the rainy inter days dont help our practise. and maybe just like my dad, i come to find that it’s not so easy to let go even though i too know i have too.
may all who journey remember to be grateful for all the courage and wisdom and compassion which brought us to wherever we are right now and may we trust that it will ge us to wherever it is we need to go.
thank you for giving me this life, thank you mom, thank you dad, may you know my gratitude for this gift of life is how i remember you both.
8. November OZ9
Morgan up n ready for school this a.m. first time in a week. She was mended by the week end though so yesterday (Sunday) we took her n ourselves up to the Hill Of Tara, for a wander round. Lovely bright day crisp and autumny, lots of brown gold on the tree and for once hardly any wind upon the hills. she was a bit reluctant at first Morgan was but once we got going and she was able to get photos of the sheep wandering about. She got a new phone for her birthday from Shelly’s mother and it has a camera on it – pretty good one at that. anyway after about an hour of walking then over to the book shop Morgan found herself a book on legends of Tara which happened to be written by the fellow running the shop so her autographed it for her. Then to Morgan’s favourite bit, the coffee shop for sandwiches and the “best hot chocolate ever”
Today after oatmeal, meditation, then yoga, then work on new poetry “Still Wishing To Be Ravens”. after making a fire!! frosty a.m. plan to up load photos from yesterday and do a bit of a blog post. hence these note. finally copping on that if I create notes on word then copy and past to web log then less wasting of time on line wandering around, more and easier control eg spell checks, font size etc. then must to the boiler room attend rearrange the summer storage so we can heat the place without burning it down. yes we do use oil on extreme occasions. still half a tank left and we’ve been here two winters and it’s not a giant tank just we tend to freeze a bit and use hot water bottle for sleeping and fireplaces to eat the rooms we use. no thing and no one is perfect except in that they are perfect whatever they are at the moment. Anyway back to the manuscript or wordfilescript.
so a few hours and one coffee and one lunch (tuna mayo copped bell pepper, chopped onion, chopped rocket, crush black pepper serve on your best home made bread slices with a couple of gherkins on the side).
bogged down a bit uploading new anti-virus updated soft ware. but almost done for this. good bit of work. ok with my little part of the world. uploaded photos, checked emails. next time will send out some new work to paying magazines.
so take steamed chicken breast (left over) shred – take two forks and pull in opposing directions, put in bowl, chop green olives, say abt half-dozen, dice half onion, tomatoes sauce few table spoons left over from aubergine sauce, add cumin good dash. bit a salt n black pepper, chopped sweet red bell pepper, if you want heat use chiles or whatever you got, heat together in sauce pan get it hot a few splashes of wine and tomatoes past to get a consistency, mix in a cup or less cooked rice, lay into and wrap up in corn tortillas, put some cheese in first – shreds of whatever you got last night used swiss, and some mozzarella, wrap, top with a bit of olive oil and if theres any sauce left and some more cheese. heat in oven in oven proof dish or pan, when cheese melts and gets a bit crisp take out and eat. served with beer and a rocket dry salad, some fresh tomatoes for garnish. works.
today our breakfast routine oat meal , organic oats with a few tablespoons of flax seeds (whole n cracked) cooked with organic milk( not water), served with dash butter, spoon of honey – takes 7mins to cook. fresh lemon juice with vitamin pills and st johns tincture, horse-tail tincture.
tip: no matter what you have for breakfast start off each day with black coffee in bed. (by now you should no better regarding too much dairy and too much sugar – so choose your use carefully, milk in oatmeal infinitely better than milk in coffee, and then your done with milk for the day. yeas we use cheeses in cooking but when you shred you can use less and get more flavours out of that less, also goats and blue cheeses are more beneficial and not matter what go for quality – a cheap cheese is most likely lots of additives and fatatives) any way coffee in bed – very important!
be open to learning new things: http://worldmuslimcongress.blogspot.com/2009/11/fort-hood-tragedy.html even if you need to be brave to do so.
Laurie Anderson home of the brave IS good yoga music!!
Lunch: two, two egg omelets, two eggs,chives sNp, whisked, splash of olive oil in a non stick pan, low heat, whisk eggs pour in let cook, when you can get it to come up on you egg turner, lay some rocket into the middle, fold in half, split into two pieces so you can handle easier, flip over cook until slightly golden brown. serve with more black coffee and oj and some greens and a slice of your best homemade bread. Use abt a six-inch pan, not too big!
dinner – white beans with light tomato sauce served over pasta, use white wine and garlic and thyme in sauce, use parmesan as garnish, make a proper tossed salad of red leaf lettuce, rocket (of course) shalots shred of carrot, balsamic,xtra virgin, sNp pinch of mustard and raspberry jam. (boil beans in a veg. stock of shredded carrot,chopped celery,left over half of red bell pepper, chopped onion – handful, some parsley and oregano, saute veg in olive oil when soft add beans which were soaked over night, toss around add just enough water to cover, cook, add water if needed as you go, oh yeah a dash of wine after veg soften, also add a few bits of garlic while sauteing, to add a subtle heat add whole chile, take out after sauteing is finished – before you add water. a few bay leaves never go astray leave in untill beans are cooked then take away the leaves, bay leaves were used a an ancient roman poison, while not toxic in and of themselves, the remain sharp enough to cut the internal organs during digestion, so the old roams would grind them small enough to be crunchy but not impossible to eat, especially if your were full of wine, and even if you visited the vomitorium theyd get you as they came out that way so there you go.) anyway use abt a cup of beans, when cooked mix with a cup or two of tomato sauce. done.
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